Luke 4:1-13

This is the passage where Jesus is tested by the Devil. I'm not going to print it all out, but pay close attention to how Jesus responded to all of Satan's temptations. He answered the Devil with Scripture. Old Testament Scripture to be exact. I've been told before that the Old Testament isn't relevant today. That is completely untrue. Almost every time I sit down and read the Old Testament I find little jewels of wisdom that completely pertain to life today. Apparently, Jesus did as well. ;-) It is what He used to fight the Devil there in the wilderness. 

I feel a conviction coming on. If Satan were to come to me today and tempt me with things that look so "pretty" to me, would I have enough Scripture knowledge to fight him? Am I armed with the Sword of the Spirit? Not by a long shot! So, how does one get armed? By memorizing Scripture. By having enough knowledge of the Word of God that I can use it - without thinking - to ward off Satan's attacks. That changes this year. My goal this year is to read the Bible and to memorize Scripture. I'm slow at memorizing, but I have already memorized 3 passages of Scripture and plan to memorize much more this year. .

For a great tool to help you (and your children) memorize Scripture please visit and download The Scripture Memory Connection. I've been using this with my kids for years and they really enjoy it.

Joshua 23:8a

"...Cling tightly to the Lord your God..." 

Joshua 23:8a (NLT)

Satan is attacking me. I've been faithful to read God's Word every day, looking for ways the Lord might be speaking to me. Silly me... I forgot that when we're following God's will for us, *that* is when Satan will attack. As I said in my last blog post, which you'll notice has been several days, I sinned in a great way against one of my children - using words that were meant to hurt. I'd been doing so well in guarding my tongue and then one day, for no real reason at all, I just snapped. Satan is sneaky. And boy - did he sneak up on me!

Since that day, I have been fighting with guilt and shame. I've felt unworthy to read my Bible. Unworthy to pray to God. Unworthy, even, to be in my own home. And you know what? That is Satan! My friends have been telling me this for days now, but I haven't been able to fight it. Finally, this evening, I realized that even if I don't feel worthy, I need to believe in the Truth of what the Bible says. And that Truth states that God loves me. That it is Jesus who makes me worthy, not any act of my own! I realized that I need to keep in the Word, even though I felt I didn't deserve to be in the Word. 

So, I opened my Bible and this verse is what I read. "Cling tightly to the Lord your God." How do I cling tightly? By continuing to read the Word despite what Satan is trying to get me to believe. By praying to God despite feeling like I'm a hypocrite. And to get myself to church despite thinking that if people there knew what I had said to my child they would throw me out in a heartbeat. I mean, seriously! We're all sinners here! My mom said it so wonderfully in an email to me the other day, "God has forgiven you so who are you not to forgive yourself?"

My therapist says, "Belief is faith. We cannot live our lives based on our feelings. We believe and then our feelings follow." (Or something like that.) So, what can I do with that? I can decide that, today, I am going to choose to believe what God's Word says - that I am forgiven and I am loved - even if my feelings don't match that Truth. 

"Lord God, thank you for forgiving me and loving me despite my sins. 

Help my feelings line up with your Truth. Amen."

Proverbs 8:17

"I love those who love me; those who look for me find me." 

Proverbs 8:17 (The Message)

Have you ever felt like God was missing from your life? Like he had abandoned you, despite his promise never to do that? I have. Many, many times. Looking back, I see that it was ME who had abandoned God. 

In the past, when I've gone through hard heart-wrenching times I stopped doing something that was very important to my having a strong relationship with the Lord. I stopped reading my Bible. That, my friends, is one of the most vital things we need to do if we want to feel God's presence! It's how he speaks to us, for cryin' out loud! How can we possibly expect him to be able to speak to us, if we're not in the Word?!?! {I'm yelling at myself here... LOL)

I'm going to be real blunt here. Satan lied to me, and I chose to listen to him! Satan told me that God was punishing me for sins by killing my babies. Satan told me that I must be a horrible mother and therefore God was saving my children by allowing them to die in my womb. Satan told me that I had spoken out about childhood abuse and this was my punishment for having done so. And I believed him! Knowing full-well what I know of Satan - that he is the father of lies. I chose to believe Satan over my loving Father. And this just breaks my heart. 

While that is heart-breaking to fall into that trap, there is a rainbow of grace here. Even in my darkest moments, I still longed for God. I had a deep, deep longing for God to help me through my heartache. I knew that God was the only One who could heal my broken heart. I wasn't able to read His Word for a very, very long time, but then, once I picked it up, I've been having a very difficult time putting it down. I kept looking for God and I am finding him again! I say "finding" because I'll never truly KNOW him until I get to Heaven. In this part of my journey, he is revealing more and more of himself to me and I am seeing how incredibly blessed I am! 

I pray that if you are in that dark place, wondering where God is, that you keep searching for him. Do whatever you have to do to pick up your Bible and read. Psalms is a great place to start when dealing with a broken heart. David wrote most of the Psalms and he knows a thing or two about having a broken heart. He sinned mightily against God, yet he was still called "A man after my [God's] own heart." because he continued to trust and love God. Don't believe the lies that Satan may be telling you. Look to the Bible and find the Truth of what God says about you! You are loved! And God desires to have a personal relationship with you! 

If you're not a follower of Christ, please accept him today. Don't wait. He loves you and wants to be in relationship with you. It is as easy as praying this:

Dear God,

I admit that I am a sinner in need of a Savior. I have tried 
living my life my way but I now know that I need You to guide 
me. Please forgive me of my sins [if you'd like to, list some here]. 
I want the freedom that a life with Christ can bring me. I believe 
that Jesus died on the cross for my sins. I believe he rose again. 
I want to live with him in eternity. Thank you for forgiving me. 
Thank you for sending your Son, Jesus Christ, for me. 
In His name I pray. Amen. 

If you just prayed this prayer, please leave me a comment. I would love to pray for you as you begin your journey with the Lord. I encourage you to contact a local Christian church in your area. You can also read this article at Focus on the Family for more information as to what to do next. You may also contact them and they can help you as you begin your walk with God. I encourage you to get yourself a Bible and start to read it. The Book of Romans or the Book of Mark are great places to start. If you don't have the money for a Bible, please contact The Gideons and I'm sure they would love to give you a free Bible. (This is the group who provides Bibles in hotel rooms.) May the Lord bless you as you begin your new life with Him!