What is "Building A House"?

"Building A House" is a blog about my journey back to God. The name comes from Proverbs 24:3-4 (The Message), "It takes wisdom to build a house, and understanding to set it on a firm foundation; it takes knowledge to furnish its rooms with fine furniture and beautiful draperies."

No, this isn't going to be a blog about making my house look pretty - at least not pretty on the OUTSIDE. But, I'm going to be working on getting my house
"pretty" on the SPIRITUAL side. I'm coming back from a pretty dark place in my life after losing 8 babies to miscarriage. This blog is about my journey back
to the Lord.

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

Proverbs 25:11-12

"The right word at the right time is like a custom-made piece of jewelry, 
and a wise friend's timely reprimand is like a gold ring slipped on your finger." 
Proverbs 25:11-12 (The Message)

Oh my. This verse really rings true. And what I'm about to write is really putting myself out there. I'm a little scared to do it, but you know what - God wants us to bring things out into the Light, so I'm praying that someone is blessed by what I'm about to say...

There was a time where I was a very angry woman. My heart was bitter, although I had so much to be grateful for. I was stressed out, adding 2 children who didn't speak English and didn't know how our family ran into our home. My husband's business was taking off and he was rarely home. I was recovering from a miscarriage and my faith was shot. And I was not a nice mama. :-(

Then, a wise friend said some pretty harsh words to me. She told me I had a vindictive spirit, among other things. I was speechless when she said that, because she said everything I was thinking about myself! (I love how God speaks through other people to get our attention!) I KNEW, in my heart, that I was not even close to being the mom God created me to be, but it took hearing it from the mouth of someone I really cared for, someone I wanted to emulate her - she had so much patience with her children and always appeared calm, no matter what she was going through. Plus, she had adopted children as well and was someone I could go to for wisdom in the adoption arena.

I really took her words to heart. I sought counseling. I spoke with my doctor and was diagnosed with PPMD and began taking medication to help with my moods. And I begged God to change my heart. He didn't do it overnight, but he DID do it. I am not the same mom I was 3-4 years ago! I sought their forgiveness for my attitude in the past and my family has forgiven me. They often comment how I never yell anymore. In fact, my youngest son's memory of that time is slowly fading. Sure, I get frustrated with my kids still. But, I cannot tell you the last time I disciplined them in anger. Grace is seen more in our home now and healthy, strong relationships are being built.

Thank you Jesus!

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